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Both ChefAl and my brother Lloyd Williamson sent me this piece, so (sigh....) I guess I better clean it up a little, combine the differences, and print it. ChefAl calls it the Chain of Fools Letter.
Don't blame me. This is a fairly clean joke and it's kitchen humor - on someone else's site. See Old George.
If you like word plays, get ready to moan and groan (or croak!). From my sister-in-law, Kathy Williamson. (Lloyd's wife - I tell him that they richly deserve each other.) See The Frog.
Math through the Decades from my brother, Lloyd Williamson, always on the cutting edge of anything academic...
Now that I'm older... here's a few words of wisdom I'd like to share with you!
Bet at some time you've eaten some terrible food at a restaurant or take-out, right? See this list of hilarious eatery complaints at WebFoodPro's discussion group, The Great Hall: The Comments Zagats Could Not Print...
From ChefAl, a quote: "Also known as 'women's intuition,' this sixth sense thing is no myth. Women seem to know what's going on in their man's lives almost better than they do. Why is this? In the early 80's researchers discovered that women have more connections between the brain's two hemispheres than men do. It's these connections that allow them to put together a puzzle from seemingly unconnectable pieces." ChefAl's comment: "That, and they go through your pockets while you're in the shower."
Here's a goody from the 'look who's talking' department: Darned Women Drivers!
Remember when TV was recorded live - and we watched the Hollywood Squares? Some humdingers from ChefAl
From Fuller Rep Linda Mann: HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED: Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
Apparently ChefAl just can't bear it.... see the furry actors.
Here's a true piece of wisdom from ChefAl: "If you were singing Christmas songs on your neighbor's lawn at night with your church group, it's called "caroling." But if you were doing it alone, with no pants on, it's called "drunk and disorderly." You found this out by personal experience, Chef Al, right?
It's not too late for the 10 top Christmas Shopping Carols from my brother, Lloyd Williamson.
My brother Lloyd Williamson forwards this piece of holiday office communication which I'm sure you'll richly enjoy: Annual Christmas Party. Let it remind us that this season is basically a celebration of life in the midst of death (winter), and let each of us celebrate life to the fullest this holiday season in our own way.
Lovable Louise was a real Christmas doll and it was a holiday dinner to remember . I laughed so hard at this one I had to take a couple of breaks 'cause I forgot how to program. Forwarded by author Cynthia MacGregor.
Donated by ChefAl as per comedian George Carlin: "Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards."
From my brother, Lloyd Williamson, "The Dead Cat Test", plus an awful pun.
From my brother, Lloyd Williamson: Everything I need to know, I learned from Noah's Ark.. In these difficult times when we're flooded with troubles, this advice is priceless.
Did you know the author of the Dr. Seuss series wrote a howler of a book called "The Pocketbook of Boners"? I spent many hours as a child howling at it. See some samples. There's links to games and fun, too. More: did you know that Dr. Seuss's early work was advertising and political cartoons? In addition, here's a collection of crazy reporting and hilarious headlines from Harvard News. Have a look at The Pocketbook of Boners & Harvard Headlines.
Are you getting along in years? Dealing with someone who is? Have your funny bone ready - you'll need it. Here's some samples at Senior Resource.
A groaner from my brother Lloyd Williamson: Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. Don't know what you want to be when you grow up? Don't worry, here's some notes about various occupations that he also sent. (Please! Don't blame me. It's his fault.) Read Fun at Work.
A woman walks into a vet's waiting room. She's dragging a wet rabbit on a leash. The rabbit does not want to be there. Read "Silly wabbit!" sent on from ChefAl.
I complemented (more or less) ChefAl on a new image that linked to his forum - if you ever had a dog that liked to drink from the handy "water fountain" in your bathroom you'll know what we're talking about. Made the mistake of telling ChefAl an amusing but very private family story, and he NAGGED ME AND NAGGED ME until I came through with a picture. See my version at Oops! I should never let ChefAl be "privy" to anything embarrassing.
My brother Lloyd sent me a lighter note: Funny Labels. He asks, "Is the human race doomed through stupidity?"
Never mind which came first, the chicken or the egg. ChefAl tells us where cats and dogs came from.
Fuller Brush Rep Linda Mann is another example of America's indomitable spirit. Although somewhat handicapped and often in pain or hospitalized, she spreads cheer, makes a stray cat (BooBoo) very happy, comforts her friends and almost never complains, just expresses wishes for better days and better times. For a lighter moment, read her forward, "Lena Returns Home".
As you may have noticed, ChefAl and I had a running argument about (1) the safety of sushi and (2) the edibility of zucchini. He never gives up. Here's an educational page he sent me. Read Safe Sushi. As the hymn goes.... and Freddy Fender... "Almost Persuaded....." Picture of said dog Cuca at Assistants. Doesn't she look intelligent? She would eat zucchini, ChefAl, happily.
The Sneaky Kitchen
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