For all of you caring for an elderly friend or relative,
having one in a nursing home, or working with the elderly, stop
and think about this poem forwarded by the head of our
"This poem appeared when an old lady died
in the geriatric ward of a hospital near Dundee, Scotland. It was felt
that she had left nothing of value. Then the nurses, going through
her possessions, found this poem. Its quality so impressed the
staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the
hospital. One nurse took her copy to Ireland. The old lady's
sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of
the News Magazine of the North Ireland Association for Mental Health.
A slide presentation has also been made based on the poem."
Look At Me
What do you see, nurses, what do you see,
what are you thinking when you're looking at me?
A crabby old woman, not very wise,
uncertain of habit, with faraway eyes.
Who dribbles her food and makes no reply
when you say in a loud voice, "I do wish you'd try?"
Who seems not to notice the things that you do,
and forever is losing a stocking or shoe.
Who, resisting or not, lets you do as you will
with bathing and feeding, the long day to fill.
Is that what you're thinking? Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse; you're not looking at me.
I'll tell you who I am as I sit here so still,
as I use at your bidding, as I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of ten with a father and mother,
brothers and sisters, who love one another.
A young girl of sixteen, with wings on her feet,
dreaming that soon a lover she'll meet.
A bride soon at twenty- my heart gives a leap,
remembering the vows that I promised to keep.
At twenty-five now, I have young of my own
who need me to guide and a secure happy home.
A woman of thirty, my young now grown fast,
bound to each other with ties that should last.
At forty my young sons have grown and are gone,
but my man's beside me to see I don't mourn.
At fifty once more babies play round my knee,
again we know children, my loved one and me.
Dark days are upon me, my husband is dead;
I look at the future, I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing young of their own,
and I think of the years and the love that I've known.
I'm now an old woman and nature is cruel;
'tis jest to make old age look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles, grace and vigor depart,
there is now a stone where I once had a heart.
But inside this old carcass a young girl still dwells,
and now and again my battered heart swells.
I remember the joys, I remember the pain,
and I'm loving and living life over again.
I think of the years; all too few. Gone too fast,
and accept the stark fact that nothing can last.
So open your eyes, nurses, open and see,
not a crabby old woman; look closer- see ME!!
Remember this when you interact with an elderly person-
because we'll all probably be there some day.